A Message for Moms

"A good mother thinks about her children day and night, even when they are grown, A good mother loves her children in a way that they will never understand. A mom will be there for her children when no one else will. A mom would take a bullet, stand in front of a train, and ask god to take her instead of her child. If you have a child or children that you love as much as i love mine, post this" (A recent Facebook posting)

I am a mom whose sons are grown men. I love them so very much, and I confess that I was not always the mom I should have been. Looking back now I see that so many of the things that upset me and set me off were really nothing of any importance. I let my frustrations with work, with situations, and with external relationships barge into my relationship with my family way too often. You know, I loved my sons, but far too often I was so selfish about my own feelings and frustrations that I exploded on them because they were there, and I felt that they should know what I needed without my having to ask for it.

Even though I believe that I have a wonderful, loving relationship with my sons, I regret that so much of my time with them as they were growing up was spent in me meeting my own goals and plans and desires. All those goals and plans and desires mean so little to me now, and I wish so much that I could have the time back to spend loving on them, playing with them, laughing and enjoying life with them. But the time is gone, they are grown and have their own lives now.

All this just to remind all you moms out there that still have children at home, they are the MOST IMPORTANT people in your life (right after God and your husband). Let the dishes go, let studies and groups pass you by, allow the floor to be filled with toys now and then. I promise you, one day you will wish that you could sit on the floor playing cars or legos with those grown sons. You will wish that you could have a tea party with your baby girl.

Don't allow ANYTHING to become more important to you than they are, not even ministry or service for God. Your children and your husband ARE your ministry. Notice I said your children and your husband. I did not say your house. Your house will not feel the sting of being overlooked or ignored. Your house will not take it to heart if you are upset that it isn't always on top of things as it should be.

Please hear me, I am not saying that you should let your house become an unhealthy and unsafe pigsty. Nor am I saying that you should have no time to yourself and no time to enjoy your favorite things. But as a mom who has had to let her sons go onto their own adult lives, I am so encouraging you to relax, enjoy their short time in your life. I am encouraging you to let the dishes wait until you have spent some time tickling and laughing with them.

One other thing I will share from the message at church this morning. Our children learn what they see at home. If you are frustrated and impatient and upset all the time, they will be too. If you have little time for them, they will soon have little interest or time for you. Remember the popular song, "The Cat's in the Cradle?"

Please, relax, take a breath. Really look into the eyes of your children. The thing they long for more than any high-priced gadgets or any theme parks is you. They want your time, they want your attention, they want to know they are more important to you than the clean floor, the new drapes, the chat you are having with your BFF (can't believe I am actually using those letters).

Just saying . . .

Love,
Ev

The One Thing that is our First Love