It is amazing, sometimes, the way God works in a life. With all that has been happening, I tend to be so distracted from what really is going on. Sometimes, though, it is not so much that I am distracted as it is that I don't want to see what is happening.

I met with a dear friend last night to chat and catch up with one another; we haven't gotten together since before the holidays. What a nice time we had chatting with one another and catching up. Both of us had burdens to share and help to offer one another.

As we talked, somehow we dredged up an ongoing situation in my life, and my friend offered some godly insight and wisdom that I wasn't expecting and wasn't really wanting to hear. I had all my excuses, arguments, and reasons to dismiss what she had to say, and I left feeling thoughtful and worried that she may be right.

This morning as I did my study, God just seemed to zero in on the subject and gave me a peace about the whole thing, with perhaps even a little sense of anticipation. I am in a Bible Study right now, and we are studying Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby (a really awesome study that I highly recommend). So as I was going over my study this morning, the first things to catch my eye were:

You cannot know the truth of your circumstances until you have heard from God. He is Truth! Truth is present and active in your life!

Do not evaluate your situation until you have heard from Jesus. He is Truth.

Two words in a Christian's language cannot go together: 'No, Lord!' . . . Do not proceed until you can honestly say, 'Whatever You want of me, Lord, I will do it.'

Firstly, I had not really asked God about the situation. I had reasoned in my heart the circumstances and what I should do. Secondly, I did not know whether I wanted to hear what He had to say or that I could answer 'yes'. Nevertheless, as I was meditating on this, God's grace was so good as to melt my heart and bring me to the point of being willing to hear what He had to say.

The study then went on to talk about the times of decision in the history of the Israelites and the altars that they erected to mark those times and to remember God's activity in their lives. Henry Blackaby calls these Spiritual Markers in our lives and says that they provide us with opportunities to share with others about God's activity on behalf of His people. This reminded me of my Thoughts, and how I can share what God is doing in my life with you.

Another thing he mentioned in the study is the way God tends to rehearse His previous activity in our lives so that we can see His perspective on what is happening in the present. That is why I love my journals, they connect me to all the spiritual markers along the path of my life.

When God is ready for you to take a new step or direction in His activity, it will always be in sequence with what He has already been doing in your life. He does not go off on tangents or take meaningless detours. He builds your character in an orderly fashion with a divine purpose in mind.

As I looked back over my life, I could see how this new situation is somewhat related to what God has been doing in my life. And this helped me so much to realize that this is not something new or something I should be afraid of. I have faced similar situations in the past and been blessed through them. I began to look at this situation as a new leg in the journey of my life.

Then, what do you know, when I logged in to my email, I came across an inspirational email that began by quoting my life's verse. It then went on to talk about the "Sacred Journey" God is calling us to. Wow!! Nearly knocked my socks off (except I was barefoot at the time). A second inspirational email finished with the quote: "The adventure is about to begin . . .".

So, I'm not sure what God is doing. I have some ideas and I am asking Him to guide me into His timing for the situation and His ways of walking through this. And I invite you to join me in the sacred journey ahead, whatever that is in your life. The adventure is about to begin and continue for each one of us.

Blessings in Christ Jesus our Lord and the Author and Finisher of our faith,
Ev

Model Christians

Hi! This morning in my quiet time, I started out by reading some of the things I have kept in my "Mini-Me Journal" and it prompted a thought that I would like to share with you:

There is no such thing as a model Christian. Every one of us is unique and meant to be so. Because you see others whom you admire for their faith, love, wisdom, or goodness does not mean God wants you to be like them. God created you as a unique member of the body, and He wants to use you, your life, as He created you. I have many people in my life that I admire so much, and often I can become discouraged because I don't measure up to them as I see them.

I see their wisdom, their ministry, their kindness and love, or their accomplishments and then look at my own life and see myself lacking. Then the really sad part is that I don't see within me the nature nor the motivation to do the things I see them doing. Well, i realized that God did not design me to be a "Helen," a "Sarina," a "Neva," a "Ruth," a "Debbie," a "Monika," or a "Brenda." (Oh, wow!!! I could name a handful more of you that I look at with love and admiration! Sorry, I hope this doesn't become about whose name I did or did not include.)

Of course, that is not to say that I cannot use them as examples and encouragement to grow in certain areas. I long so much to love others as I Monika loved me. But I should not expect nor strive to become all that they are. Nor should I berate myself for not measuring up to them in those areas in which they shine. I need to go to God to learn from Him who He has created me to be, which will be a lifelong journey of discovery. And then I need to walk with Him day by day to find the ways He has wants to include me in the work He is doing.

I hope this blesses you as it did me. Just being inspired from God was such a blessing for me, and I thank God.

As I said, I love you all. Each one of you has blessed my life so richly, and I admire each one of you for the ways that I see God using you to minister to the hearts and minds of those around you!! You are each a beautiful and unique and glorious gift from the Lord for my life.

Love,

Ev

Depression - A State of Mind

Dearest Friends:

I want to apologize to many of you who responded to my previous email. I intended to write back to you thanking you for your concern and letting you know that I am perhaps not as badly off as I may have led you to believe. However, I seem to be having such a difficult time writing or even talking about this place I am in at the moment, so much so that I have been putting off my responses hoping things would improve.

This is so difficult to write or talk about, so forgive me if this comes off disjointed (I keep deleting and rewriting sentences). Again, thank you all so much for your loving concern and your encouragement in response to that email. You bless me more than you will ever know.

So, where am I? I have been asking myself the same question. I am better. The sadness, anxiety, and trouble focusing have lifted. I am able to cope with my day to day life again. But I am not where I would hope to be. It is rather like being dissociated a little from the normal ups and downs of life. I am no longer sad or anxious, but neither am I happy and interested in life. Even the most exciting events seem like a lot of work. The passion of my life has become uninteresting or just too much bother, and curling up with my covers pulled up over my head seems much more appealing.

I am OK though, so you do not have to worry about me.

I wrote the above about 3 days ago and saved it as a draft because I got busy with work AND because it was so hard to write or to even know what I wanted to say.

For the past couple of days I have been feeling a bit better, so I thank God. I read something that I think helped a little, I found it in my "Mini-Me Journal." I had it written down, but I cannot remember if it was a quote or if it was something that God had impressed on me directly at the time.

When it feels as though God has gone or is hiding, think of Him as standing just behind you, just out of sight, ready to catch you, teaching you to trust that He will always be there for you.

I tend to think it is something that I wrote down at some point because it is such a run-on sentence. LOL! It is so easy when you are not hearing God's voice (whether it is that He isn't speaking or that you aren't listening) to feel as though you are on your own. It is NEVER true. When you are His child, He is always right there with you, always ready to catch you and to bless you.

I have also been helped by the study we are doing on Wednesday nights, Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby. He gives some good direction for when you are in a time of God's silence:

• Pray through a sin checklist (in other words, examine your heart for any unconfessed sin). Confess and repent, making things right.
• Continue doing the last thing God told you, as well as the things you know to do. (reading/studying the Bible, prayer, fellowship with other believers, etc.).
• Go back to God believing that He will let you know what is happening when and if you need to know. In other words, Ask Him and trust Him.
• Put away discouragement, guilt, and self-pity.
• Adjust your life to an attitude of hopeful expectation, faith and trust. Expectation that God is doing something deep in your life.

So, as I said, I am feeling a bit better. Again, I am so sorry for not responding sooner to everyone. It is such a difficult place to be, so hard to communicate and reach out to others. So difficult to even get your thoughts straight or to know what you are thinking/feeling. I love you all and thank you all so much for your prayers, your concern, your encouragement, and your love!!

Love,
Ev

Just whatever is on my mind . . .

Warning! This "Thought" may be inappropriate for some readers...

OK, so I feel like talking but there is no one at hand to listen at the moment. So . . .

Depression is such a difficult thing to deal with. It feels almost like quicksand. You feel yourself sinking down into its enveloping embrace, and you know the danger there. Yet, the solid ground seems to be so far beyond reach, and you have no energy left with which to struggle.

It is so amazing that you can be surrounded by loved ones, yet feel so deserted and alone. You want someone to listen, to care, to comfort. Yet, at the same time, you find yourself pulling away and pushing away any comfort offered. "Everyone is busy. They have more important things to deal with than your self-pity." Besides, what will they think of you if you let them know what is going on inside you? "Weakling. Coward."

They don't have to say it, you've said it to yourself a hundred times or more. "Come on, what's wrong with you? Stop feeling so sorry for yourself and do something. Stop Whining! What have you got to feel bad about? Stop being such a baby!" How long before they will avoid you? Will they walk by pretending they didn't see you?

OK, enough whining!

Sorry, I know that this isn't what you were wanting to read, and I most certainly should not post it. But it is what is on my mind and on my heart. Delete it, forget it, let it go. It is nothing, but it is my thought for today.

Ev


One thing have I desired and that will I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life to behold the beauty of the Lord and to enquire in His tablernacle. Psalm 27:4

How will you respond?

San Diego County officials shut down home Bible study

County official interrogates pastor and his wife

May 28, 2009

A San Diego pastor and his wife have been told they cannot have a Bible couple says they were interrogated by a San Diego County official, then threatened with ever increasing fines if they refuse to stop the Bible study.

According to the couple's attorney, they were questioned about the Bible study. "'Do you have a regular meeting in your home?" The pastor's wife replied, "Yes." "Do you say 'amen'?" the official asked. "Yes," she replied. "Do you pray?" Again she said, "Yes." "Do you say 'praise the Lord'?" Another "Yes." The official told the pastor and his wife they were in violation of county rules.

The Bible study usually has an average of about 15 people.

A few days later they got a written warning that listed the home Bible study an "unlawful use of land." They were notified to "stop religious assembly or apply for a major use permit," which could cost them thousands of dollars.

Could a small poetry club meet regularly in a home? Apparently, yes. What about a Cub Scout meeting? Evidently, yes. What if they meet regularly to watch Monday Night Football? Obviously, yes.

(Hi, received this in an email some time ago, and I was rather shocked. I began this “Thought” at the time, but was interrupted before posting it. Just came across it and decided the ideas are still valid.)

Wow! Could it be possible that any level of our government would consider interfering with a Bible Study in someone's home? I know it happens overseas. In fact, when I lived in Jordan there was a period of time where the government prohibited all religious gatherings within homes. But here, in America? Interesting!

We have been blessed for so long with religious freedom that I'm not sure we can imagine what it would be like to have that freedom compromised. What if we were facing a time when we could no longer worship or gather together in His name. I'm not trying to frighten you with some doom and gloom scenario. Christians throughout history have faced these challenges; Christians around the world are facing them now. There is no reason to suppose that we will never face such a trial. But I'm wondering what our response will be.

I remember a long time ago hearing a news report of Christians gathered outside of an abortion clinic trying to rescue the unborn. The reporter focused on how difficult it was for the women to walk through those Christians to receive the 'help' they needed. At the time, I remember wondering how many Christians would be willing to walk through the midst of a protesting, angry mob to go to church. Would we be willing even to break the law to gather together? Would Americans be willing to risk their lives to worship together?

What I am asking you to consider is your relationship with the Father, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit, and with the Church? How important is it to you? How important would it be if it were to become difficult, even life-threatening, to live out that relationship? You could say, "Well, I don't have to gather together with other believers to be a Christian or to have a relationship with God. I can pray, read my Bible, and follow Him on my own." The Bible states plainly that we do need to gather together; we need one another in our relationship with Him. Paul uses the body as a picture of the Church, emphasizing how much we need one another. A hand or an eye or a toe cannot remain viable on its own for long, it will die. Even so, a Christian trying to live the Christian life on their own will find that life becoming stale, dry, and dead without the other parts of the body.

Recently, our church held a “Small Groups Fair” to introduce the new small group studies that were starting up for this fall. Our tables were spread out through the sanctuary so that attendees could walk around and gather information on the available groups and choose one that would be their opportunity to become connected within the body to other members. It was interesting to watch as the service ended how many just walked out without even considering becoming involved.

I overheard one of the couples that were visiting the different tables lament that fact that their schedules were so busy that they just did not know how they could possibly fit in one more thing. I totally understand, believe me, I know how crazy life has become for all of us. But I want to ask you, where are your priorities? I understand, you want your children to be involved in sports that will teach them life-skills, you have clubs and activities that add so much to your life, and then there is the very necessary family time. But have you considered how ultimately important fellowship with other believers really is? How important the spiritual growth and development of you and your family are?

Sunday morning service is amazing! It offers us opportunity for corporate worship as a body, we hear messages that encourage and direct our walks in the path of righteousness, and we are given the privilege of presenting our tithes and offerings to the Lord. The one thing Sunday morning lacks is the opportunity for deep and personal connection with other believers, along with the growth and development only such connection provides. This is where small groups come in, providing the personal connection, the encouraging support, and the opportunity for Holy Spirit to manifest Himself to you through the gifts He has given to others (not even to mention the opportunity for you to experience God as His Spirit manifests through your life in the gifts He has given you). As I have already stated, God created His body specifically to draw us to one another, to make us interdependent on one another.

Two [are] better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him [that is] alone when he falleth; for [he hath] not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm [alone]? And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecc 4:9-12

We need one another. Along with the priority of our relationship to God, we also need to give priority to our place in the body. Right now we have the freedom to come together. We have the opportunity to be a member of the living body of Christ. If we don’t see the value now, will we see it when/if it becomes a life and death decision?

Just another thought on this article:

When we are faced with an "unfair or illegal" attack on our “freedoms,” how should we respond? An article I read as I checked out this story, said that there were some calls for picketing, for harassing county officials, for jamming local call-in station's phone lines. Another article said that Blogs were running with this story and that one even (supposedly) suggested the best positioning for snipers. I mean, could this be true? Surely the more outrageous of these ideas did not come from the Church of our heavenly Father. Our hearts would NEVER consider snipers or violence. Any response to the world’s attempts to limit our ‘freedom’ should always be expressed with the heart and mind of Christ.

Love,

Ev

One thing have I desired and that will I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life to behold the beauty of the Lord and to enquire in His tablernacle. Psalm 27:4

The Bible and the Two Covenants

I’d like to share with you the first lesson of a study I did quite some time back. The study was on the book of Matthew, but I started off with a quick overview of the Bible, the New Testament, and the Gospels to get things kicked off. When our church began reading through the New Testament, it brought back so much of what I had researched and put together, and I wanted to share it with you.

Purpose

A collection of writings, the Bible was written by at least 40 authors and has been organized into 66 books. Any particular ‘book’ of the Bible may have originally been a history, a collection of songs, a collection of wise sayings, a record of prophetic messages, or a letter to a body of believers. These writings were gathered together over the course of 1400-1800 years.

The Bible is both an account of the redemption of man and the story of God’s effort to reveal Himself to man. As such, it focuses upon the Redeemer (John 1:29, John 10:10-11, John 14:6) and the Revealer, i.e. the Lamb of God and the Word of God – Jesus Christ (John 1:1, John 14:9, John 10:30, and John 1:18). By the way, the Greek in John 1:1 for ‘Word’ is ‘logos’, which conveys an expression of the nature, concept, thought, and spirit, not simply the physical sounds or the written characters.

Because of the nature and purpose of the Bible, we should not expect it to contain an historic account of all of civilization, nor should we look there to find the details of the design of our world and the nature of the universe. The Bible also does not have very much to say about eternity past nor eternity future. Instead, it is focused on the realm of time and space in which God chose to reveal His great glory, mercy, and grace in the redemption of His creation.

Old and New

The 66 ‘books’ of the Bible are divided into what we now refer to as the Old Testament and the New Testament. What these terms are attempting to convey is that the Old Testament (made up of the writings collected as sacred Scripture by the Jews – 39 ‘books’) deals primarily with the covenantal relationship of God to the physical descendents of Abraham through Isaac (the nation of Israel). This covenantal relationship was based upon a system of laws instituted by God and later expanded and developed by religious leaders to include their traditions and legal interpretations; much like any governmental system is expanded and developed over time. And just as our legal system can only govern the outward obedience to the law, so the Old Covenant (Old Testament) is all about maintaining an outward obedience to the law, which proved of little use in changing hearts and minds and of no use whatsoever in transforming sinful man into a holy, new creation. Of course, God realized this from the beginning, we did not. The Old Covenant was to teach us just how incapable we are in our flesh to obey God’s righteous commands.

The New Testament (New Covenant) contains the Christian Scriptures, which relate to the covenantal relationship of God to the Church, through Jesus Christ. This new covenant is based upon the sacrificial death of the Lamb of God, Who redeemed us (paid the penalty for our sin). Because of our faith in His finished work, we are ‘born again’ (born of the spirit) as a new creation in Christ (something totally different from what we were). Our sins have been atoned for by the shed blood of Jesus, so when we believe and receive His saving gift, we stand before God justified (made righteous). This is an amazing concept for which we have many analogies, but sometimes find it hard to grasp, which is why we tend to get all caught up in trying to live under some system laws. (Remember, it didn’t work for the Jews, and it won’t work for us.)

I love Romans 12:1-2, which tells us not to be conformed to the world but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. Being conformed is sort of like living under the law, you try to reign yourself in to fit into some sort of model. Transformed is from the Greek word metamorpoo. Can you guess what that means? It is a total change in nature (remember ‘new creation’), and I believe it refers to the change that only the Holy Spirit is able to accomplish in our lives from the inside (where He is) out. Even trying to conform ourselves to the perfect model of Christ is impossible for us to do by our own effort or willpower. The Holy Spirit is able to work in us as we submit to Him, and He is able to work out into our lives the righteousness Jesus died to give us.

These two concepts are contained within the New Covenant: the penalty paid once and for all by the Lamb of God and the ongoing sanctification (or remodeling work) of the Holy Spirit from within us.

OK, that’s all I can get to tonight (it is late and tomorrow is another day). I just want to add that this is a very sketchy overview. Not only is it limited by the time and space available, but also by my limited understanding and experience. (I am trying to remind you that I am not an expert by any stretch of the imagination.) Nevertheless, I hope it will bless you!

Let me leave you with one other thought that I gathered in my original research so many years ago. The Old Testament is the account of a nation (Israel), and the New Testament is the account of a Man (Jesus Christ). The nation was nurtured to bring forth the Man!

I will try to continue this tomorrow and to focus in on the New Testament and the Gospels. Love,

Ev

One thing have I desired and that will I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life to behold the beauty of the Lord and to enquire in His tablernacle. Psalm 27:4

Pour it Out to the Lord!

"He would not drink it, but poured it out to the Lord." 2 Sam. 23:16

If you have become bitter and sour, it is because when God gave you a blessing you hoarded it. Yet if you had poured it out to Him, you would have been the sweetest person on earth. If you are always keeping blessings to yourself and never learning to pour out anything 'to the Lord,' other people will never have their vision of God expanded through you. Oswald Chambers

For those of you not familiar with the passage of Scripture quoted above, it regards an incident in David's life when he was in hiding from Saul and the Philistines had a garrison in Bethlehem. In a moment of longing, David said, "Oh that one would give me drink of the water of the well of Bethlehem, which [is] by the gate!"

Three of his mighty men risked their lives because of their love for David to bring him water from the well. Yet David refused to drink it and poured it out to the Lord, saying, "Be it far from me, O LORD, that I should do this: [is not this] the blood of the men that went in jeopardy of their lives? therefore he would not drink it."

When I read this quote and this devotional by Oswald Chambers, I prayed about it because I wasn't sure how it would apply in my life. Somehow the quote touched me deeply. I felt that it applied to a particular area of blessing in my life, but I just could not quite understand how.

Then as I read my Scripture portion for the morning, I came across the incident between Jesus and Peter in which Peter rebuked Him for telling them that the Son of Man would "suffer many things, and be rejected of the elders, and [of] the chief priests, and scribes, and be killed, and after three days rise again." Jesus "rebuked Peter, saying, 'Get thee behind me, Satan: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but the things that be of men.'"

Jesus then went on to say to His disciples and to the multitude: "Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it."

I really felt that this was an answer to my prayer regarding the pouring out of the blessing in my life. I felt God was trying to tell me that it is about being whole-hearted and holding on to NOTHING. It is being willing to lay it all down and let it all go in faith.

Some years ago, I went through a very difficult situation, and I realize now that I was so distraught because I was trying to save the 'life' I thought was mine. The situation itself developed because I had tried to fit my 'life' into the mold that someone else had set for me and because of my overriding desire to be accepted. In the end, I had to let go of a marvelous blessing God had given me.

My prayer is that the Lord will help me to remember this. I pray that I will remember to hold very loosely the blessings He gives, or rather that I will NOT hold them at all but will pour them out to Him. I want to be willing to pour it all out without reservation and without giving into the fear of man that haunts me, to pour my very life out to Him.

For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?

Love,
Ev


One thing have I desired and that will I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life to behold the beauty of the Lord and to enquire in His tablernacle. Psalm 27:4